Have you ever heard of the saying, "You have to work with what life gives you."? Life may have given you a loving and wealthy family. That is not too hard to work with. However, on the other hand, what if life left you parentless? Homeless? Enslaved? Disabled? Can you still say that is not too hard to work with? Everyone is born with difference strengths, weaknesses, circumstances, and abilities. No matter the circumstances, everyone has the capability to make the most of what they are given.
In Yann Martel's Life of Pi, he gives clear examples of ecosystems, which are environments which sustain living organisms and life and contain food chains and webs that demonstrate the prey and predator relationship along with a few others. As Yann Martel graphically illustrates a predator pouncing and victimizing it's prey, life contains a social hierarchy similar to the food web presented in Life of Pi.
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ReplyDeleteHey! I had a really difficult time trying to organize my thoughts. If you have any commeents and advice, I would appreciate it! Thank you! :) Should I combine the two?
ReplyDeleteI assume that this is your introductory paragraph. If so, I am left confused as to where the paper is headed. You bring to the table ideas, and I presume they will be discussed, but I am not sure under which section of the essay they will fit in.
ReplyDeleteIf you're struggling with organization, I recommend putting together a rough outline of what you would like to talk about and then assemble a paragraph that will lead into the discussions.
Good luck with the other sections!
Find exactly what you want to talk about and write a strong thesis statement to keep you on track through your paper. You're alright kid!
ReplyDeleteRight now, what I don't understand is why you move from talking about the hand you're dealt to ecosystems. If it's background to help explain what a crazy situation Pi was in you could mention that first. The two paragraphs just don't seem connected right now. I can't wait to hear about where you go with this!
ReplyDeleteWell what I do sometimes to organize and get thoughts flowing is I just start writing. When a thought or an idea comes that I can use later, I write a sentence or two about it down and then go back to the main part of what I'm trying to say. When I have a few of these random sentences, I look over them and rearrange the order, add to them, modify them and/or delete them so it all makes sense. I hope you can understand what I just said, I'm not very good at explaining things ;)
ReplyDeleteWhile I agree with some earlier comments about the relation between the two paragraph's, I did like the last sentence of the first paragraph. I think if you reword the first paragraph, you should keep the last sentence. I thought it made for a solid transition.
ReplyDeleteThank you everyone for all the feedback! It helped a bunch!
ReplyDelete