Monday, September 13, 2010
American Fork Rugby (Forkaster)
American Fork has been known for its success in marching band, cross country, and recently lacrosse. These state and nationally ranked teams are noticed by the news because of the high school they represent. This last spring, a rugby team from American Fork and Lone Peak (aka The United Rugby Club) defeated opponents left and right to get to the national championship of club high school rugby. In that championship game they pummeled the Highland rugby team who has been the champions for over fifteen years! (Watch Forever Strong and you’ll know who I’m talking about) All of our extended practices, hours of game film, and fun, hard-hitting rugby had left us the sweetest taste of victory we could ever imagine. The morning after our incredible game I scanned the paper looking for anything that could be related to rugby; approximately ten minutes later I found a 150 word article that explained a few highlights. I was baffled, speechless, disoriented; my rugby team had a national title and all we had to show for it was an “article”. It was as if rugby didn’t exist in Utah; at least not to the editors. I think the only reason this unbelievable feat went unnoticed is because it wasn’t affiliated with a well known name. If American Fork could get an official rugby team organized and sponsored; the growth rate of rugby in Utah would take flight, leaving all the other “sports” behind.
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Jake, how tragic. Not your writing, but the events you are relating. I was impressed by the achievement and felt the same confusion and disappointment when I found out that your rugby team was barely mentioned in the paper.
ReplyDeleteI am unsure, though, of whom you are addressing this issue to. Who would you like to invigorate and rally to your cause? Why should we care if a rugby team doesn't get the spotlight? We'll always have football.
These questions, if you can answer them in your writing, will make your argument much stronger.
Mont, thank you for pointing that out! I failed to address anyone, I guess right now I'm just talking to myself. But I will make the changes and plan on sending this to the AF High newspaper editor. Thanks!
ReplyDeleteThat is so cool! I can't believe your rugby team seriously won a national championship!!! And yea, it's a shame that it didn't get more recognition than it did; I think you have a really good point. I think you can make it better by:
ReplyDelete1. More clearly stating the reason why AF should organize an official team. Is it just because rugby is such a cool sport?
2. Starting out in 1st person. You shift from third to first person in the middle of the letter.
Jake, switching from 1st person to 3rd person isn't a bad thing it just depends on what you are trying to get across in your argument, in fact it can strengthen it or weaken it deepening on how you use it. Keep at it.
ReplyDeleteI don't really know if switching from 1st to 3rd person strengthens my paper or not. I think I like going to first person because it gives a personal view.
ReplyDeleteAnd David, I can't make it too long so what do you think could be cut out so I can put some reasons why I think they should get a team?
Great argument! Good discussion in the comments.
ReplyDelete